25 Lessons Learned Over My First 25 Years

This last month, I celebrated my 25th birthday. Maybe it’s my sensitive nature, or maybe it’s just having a birthday at the end of the year, but I always find myself in a reflective headspace around my birthday and this year was no different. I was not immune to the formidable quarter-life crisis, although it finally feels like it is coming to a resolution. Being 25 is so weird. I see my friends and peers buying houses, adopting dogs, going to law school, living with their parents, having babies, living paycheck to paycheck, generally flailing, and grasping at straws. We all seem to be racing towards something without considering what reaching the finish line would really mean.

While there is so much I don’t know yet and an infinite amount of knowledge and wisdom to be gained, here are 25 lessons I learned over the first 25 years of my life!

1. Change and uncertainty are the only constants in life.
   1. You might as well get comfortable with not knowing and embracing change!
2. Hurt people hurt people and hurt people can heal.
3. Leaving a place or people harmful to your health or happiness is worth celebrating.
4. Only so much healing can be done in isolation.
   1. Cultivate or find a community conducive to your healing.
5. Everything- every feeling, every experience, every phase, every event, every issue, every stressor- is temporary.
6. You can’t save the world.
   1. But you can care for and support your community!
7. *Most* people are good.
8. If they can’t handle your emotions, it’s because they can’t handle their own emotions.
   1. Seriously– your feelings were never the problem.
9. To grow older is a privilege.
   1. Do NOT let the anti-aging market convince you otherwise!
10. Learn how to be a better friend- to yourself and others.
11. As humans, we spend a lot of time repeating patterns.
12. And if I want to stop repeating a pattern, mindfulness is necessary and usually a good first step.
13. Being anxious or afraid about something doesn’t always mean you shouldn’t still do it.
    1. Sometimes you just gotta feel the fear and do it anyway!
14. You get to decide what you will or will not have or tolerate in your life or future.
    1. Ever heard of ~boundaries~?
15. How you talk to & treat yourself changes your day-to-day experience.
    1. This book by Dr. Kristen Neff explains it all! 
16.  Focus on progress, not perfection!
17. It is totally okay if your job isn’t your purpose, calling, passion, etc.
18. Emotions don’t go away just because they’ve been numbed out, pushed aside, or shoved way down deep.
    1. Spoiler: feelings will keep coming back until they’ve been felt!
19. Just because you think it, doesn’t mean it’s true.
20. Rest and relaxation are productive and essential in preventing burnout.
21. Take your health seriously!
    1. Whether that means actually flossing your teeth daily, making a skin check appointment at the dermatologist, or quitting nicotine- just do it before it’s too late!
22. There is no such thing as failure- only lessons and redirections.
23. You don’t have to stop having fun just because you’re an adult.
24. Learn to discern between anxiety and intuition.
25. Catch up on everything you weren’t taught in childhood.
    1. We all have something we can (re)learn!

Happy New Year everyone, and thanks for reading! What are some helpful life lessons you’ve learned? Share in the comments!

Xx

You may also like…

• A Letter From Your Victim
• Top 5 Things On My Gratitude List Lately
• Playlist for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents
• Trauma Recovery Journals: April 17, 2022
• Neurodivergent vs. Neurotypical: Two Sides of the Same Coin?